Wrong About Shoprite

As one nears their Close of Service, Peace Corps advises Volunteers of the readjustment period and how one may feel anxious and overwhelmed as they reenter into the first world.   

Why am I talking about this when I just finished Mid-Service Training and am still a year out from returning home? 

 Well, let me tell ya.

I have been staying in Kampala with some other PCV’s for a couple weeks preparing for camp, attending MST, preparing a presentation to be showcased at the Peace Corps Office Grand Opening, getting my teeth cleaned, working on the All Volunteer Conference, and going to my medical appointments.  To make it cheap for Peace Corps, I have been staying at an Embassy Sponsor’s house on the outskirts of town.  I am talking real stoves, ovens, life-size refrigerators, bathtubs, washing and drying machines, hot water, and televisions with the E! Network. 

This is not where I feel anxious.  I actually feel somehow at home.

Fast forward to my shopping experience at Shoprite. 

Being that the Embassy Sponsor is actually back in America, we have had to do some food shopping.  Shoprite is a local supermarket in Kampala that welcomes you with a blast of air-conditioning, aisles of frozen food, fluorescent lighting, organized aisles, a produce market, and an alcohol corner decorated with trellis and flowers.  The workers in Shoprite do not yell “Muzungu!  Muzungu!  You first come and pick my tomatoes.”  Nor do they do not stare at you like you are some piece of artwork at the Museum of Modern Art.  They just let you be.

As I walked in to the supermarket, I could feel my heart rate increase, my airways tighten, and my body go into shock. 

I was having a panic attack.

People all around me had lists; they knew where to go and what to buy.  They had menus planned out for the week.  The employees were not the least bit interested in me.  As I stood in front of a cooler housing strawberries and pomegranates, I had to use all my might to not cry and instead take deep breaths.

At that very moment I craved village life.  I desired the simplicity of going to the market where the extent of my options were tomatoes, garlic, onions, and green peppers.  Sometimes, just sometimes, lettuce and cilantro.

The following day I encountered one of our Peace Corps Medical Officers and explained to her my reaction to this.  I told her that I was not prone to these extreme emotional feelings in the States but that something in me was triggered that day.

The best news she told me?  Upon our COS, we receive three complimentary counseling sessions to help us readjust into America. 

I will probably use those.

Until then, I will continue to live the minimal life with little variety.  The same life that is so fulfilling and rewarding.